It feels like I haven't done any art in a while! I've been doing my biannual tutoring jag where I tutor 7-10 days in a row, 5-10 hours/day, in all subjects taught at our high school. It wears me out to have to switch from explaining a semester's worth of Chemistry to a semester's worth of German I to Calculus then on to Spanish or AP US History! The students have done a great job this year being prepared, though, so it's been easier than usual. Nevertheless, it's still a lot of brain work!
In addition to that this week, on Monday I walked with my friend Lynda at 6 in the morning then went to sit with a friend who was in hospice care. Lynda and I had the most wonderful, special walk! It was foggy and misty and dark, then in the middle of that, she saw a shooting star! Then I saw one. It was part of a meteor shower that had started at midnight. We saw 6 or 7 during the course of the walk. While we were chatting, we also saw the moon rise in the east over the winter-bare trees - a thin sliver just barely there. I felt so blessed to be there at that time and see those beautiful natural wonders.
After our walk, I went to my friend's house. She had gone into a coma overnight after a long illness. I felt blessed to sit with her and simply be with her, holding the space, making sure she was OK. A couple of hours after I got there, her breathing slowed, then quickened. Another woman and I moved her a bit to help her get more comfortable then stayed beside her touching her just to be with her. Her mouth moved a bit. Her eyes closed a bit. Again her mouth. We told her how loved she was and wished her a good journey. It became clear she had stopped breathing. We checked for her heartbeat. It was no longer there. Quietly, peacefully, beautifully she left this world, and the body that moments before had been alive and still a home for her spirit was no longer needed.
This woman lived such a powerfully good life, so full of kindness and wisdom and love of others. Her generous spirit will guide those of us who knew her for many years to come. I am glad that she is no longer burdened by disease, but I will miss her tremendously.
I feel blessed to have been a witness to her passing. I have been at many births and at several deaths and have experienced each as utterly sacred. The veil between the worlds lifts, and the room is filled with Spirit. I felt it so powerfully when my oldest son was born. I felt the spirit there when I saw my grandmother's body moments after she died. I also felt her presence in the room, so loving, so completely loving. That's the sense I get in those moments - that what is on the other side is pure love.
I will probably feel regret about dying because I'll be leaving my loved ones behind and perhaps there will still be things I want to get done, but I don't feel scared at the prospect. I feel certain that I will be lovingly received by a multitude of angels when I die, just as I have seen happen to my friends who have passed on.
It's good to know, when life feels hard, that there is such love in the Universe.
May you feel it yourself today.