Thursday, December 16, 2010

I was wondering if my tutoring career would go out with a bang or with a whimper, and I guess it's gone out with a whimper.  I was supposed to tutor 3 students today to help them prepare for exams, then it snowed and school was canceled for the day and 2 of the three students canceled and the one that came learned sweetly then left without an awareness of how momentous it was for me.  I might see one of the others tomorrow or in January if exams are held then, but basically I'm done - or not - sort of.  And now I'm alone in the studio, part way into cleaning up my space so I can start anew.

It's quiet.  Very quiet.  There is snow covering the ground, but dead leaves still extend through the blanket of white.  Birch leaves and holly's green and the gold of the wind chimes break the monotony of the snow and tree trunks.

I sit, alone, maker of my own fate, having decided to leave behind what I've known best for almost 24 years. 



Allow the silence to resonate within.

This is my new life.  Quiet.  Spacious.  Thought-filled.  Inside my own head, expressing outwardly in word and image.  No need to explain derivatives or chemical formulas or metaphors or how to conjugate pintar.  Instead, the opportunity to derive my own formulations and metaphors for life and goodness and painting.  It will be different to be doing more than teaching.  A first for me.

I welcome the newness.  I breathe into this new life and am grateful.

1 comment:

  1. Awww, kiddo. I just came to your blog for the first time this minute (from Sherry Tuegel's blog.) Well, you're putting a forward-looking face on it so ... if you're not going to be blue, I guess I won't pitch any boohoo. Be well. Your paintings are wonderful!